2020 - Miss Amadoria


It’s been raining almost every day in July. This month has been nothing but a September and Ken is super pissed about it.


He reads a newspaper when a photo on one page strikes him like a lightning! 
Jesus fucking christ who is this?! A drag queen that Ken has never heard of before! And he is goooooorgeouuuuus!!!! 


This is Miss Amadoria. A new star on the sky of the Finnish drag scene.

Ken spends all day on the internet searching for more info about the most beautiful human being he has ever laid his eyes on. His head is spinning so much, that it’s impossible to sleep.



Finally a warm and sunny day without any rain! Ken and Kaarna are enjoying every second of it.



Ken’s head is still spinning because of Miss Amadoria and he wants to tell about her to Kaarna.
- Look at this video clip, the way she dances! Such a talent!
- She’s gorgeous, Ken. 
- She’s beyond gorgeous! She’s phenomenal! She’s a goddess! She’s...
- Are you seeing her as a role model or are you in love with her?
- Maybe both, Ken laughs.


- You seem very cheerful today, Ken notices.
- I had amazing casual sex last night! 
- Whaaaaaaat?!
- At the corner pub, with the bartender! 
- Taylor!!!!! Oh jesus, Ken laughs.
- Yeah, I had such a good time with her and the sex was great!



Kaarna takes off her clothes and says:
- I’ll swim naked, nobody’s around. 
- Wow you are liberated, Ken laughs and continues:
- I love to see what last night has done to you. I’m happy for you.
(And also a little jealous. Six months alone has not been easy, when all that he needs is to have someone to love.)



Ken loves to see Kaarna smile and says:
- Looks like Taylor did something right... must be the first time in her life!



Ken wakes up and checks the Facebook page of Miss Amadoria, like he does every morning. He sees something shocking, jumps out of bed screaming and might even pee himself a little...
- A surprise gig right here in my home town!!!! This evening!!!! Eeeeeeeeeeeek!!!!!



When Kaarna arrives, she finds Ken loosing his mind!
- What to wear?! Omg!!!! I’m going to see her alive!!!! We can’t be late, we must hit the front row!!!! I can’t breathe!!! Kaarnaaaaaa!!!!! Help me with these dresses!!! My stomach hurts, I hope I won’t throw up on her!!!! Eeeeek!!!!



He changes dresses again and again and Kaarna gets annoyed.
- Ken, stop it! That’s a perfect dress. You look better than Miss Amadoria herself. I hate this kind of events when everyone’s buzzing about their goddamn clothes. Nobody’s there to watch us! And just because I happen to be a woman, I’m expected to wear makeup and fancy rags. I hate theaters and parties and... 
- Nobody’s expecting anything, let’s go!!!



They arrive at a small theater very early and make it to the front row. Ken is silent, because he thinks that if he opens his mouth to speak, only vomit will come out.



The show is phenomenal! It’s a mixture of singing, dancing and stand up comedy. Miss Amadoria is radiant, and Ken is mesmerized.



When the show is over, Miss Amadoria has gotten a new fan. Also Kaarna is now very impressed. Ken is in seventh heaven. They decide to stay behind and wait in an empty theater to possibly meet the star.



From behind the curtains Miss Amadoria notices these two fans and comes to say hello. Kaarna gives some space to Ken and watches from a distance. Ken is literally trembling and he’s having trouble speaking. Somehow he manages to ask for an autograph on the newspaper. Miss Amadoria signs it with a radiant smile and then she’s gone.



One day Kaarna is starting to feel depressed again and calls Ken:
- It’s going to be sunny for a few days. Could we go camping?



Even though the days are sunny, the evenings are a bit chilly already. The autumn is near, and it makes both Ken and Kaarna sad.



- I hope it’ll be warm and sunny tomorrow, Ken mumbles.
- Me too. Let’s dive into our sleeping bags. I’m freezing.



Ken wakes up really early because of the cold, but the morning is beautiful. The water is steaming in the river just like Ken’s breath. The air temperature is only 6 degrees Celcius (43 F) but the water is probably almost 20°C (68 F).



When the sun rises high enough, Ken and Kaarna go explore the surroundings. It’s super windy up on the rocks, but they climb up to admire the magnificent view.



Ice cream at the harbor cafeteria is a perfect reward for climbing the rocks.



Ken walks on the pier and thinks that it would be lovely to go boating.



He finds a boat owner who is willing to rent his boat to the novices.
- Look, here it is! Isn’t it cute?
- Can you drive it? 
- I can do anything, I’m a doll.



It turns out that both Ken and Kaarna are excellent captains. The boat sails steadily towards the unknown.



They find a nice little island with everything one can hope for. There’s a sandy beach, a good spot for the tent and a place for a campfire as well as a forest to explore.



Ken finds mushrooms and blueberries in the forest. There are plenty of both in the nature this year.



Before bedtime they make a campfire on the sand.



The mushrooms are delicious. After the late night supper Ken and Kaarna sneak into their sleeping bags and rest well. Luckily this night isn’t nearly as cold as the night before.



Ken is daydreaming of Miss Amadoria. Luckily he’s not laying on a bed of spiky roses, but on some soft and delicate little flowers.



Kaarna has much darker thoughts as she smells the last flowers of the summer:
- How am I going to survive the winter? With the plague raging in the rest of the world we can’t even travel to any of the warm and sunny countries.



Ken and Kaarna return the boat to its owner. It’s a wonderfully hot day on the solid ground, but suddenly the wind rises. Must be a storm coming.



They manage to put up the tent right before the thunder reaches them. Ken tells Kaarna about his great idea:
- I’m going to start a fan club for Miss Amadoria! You can make the web site!
- And who will be the members of this club? Kaarna asks.
- You and me only. No one else is allowed in! I’m not going to share her with some horrible fan girls and gays!!!!!
- What a surprise, Kaarna mumbles and rolls her eyes.



The thunder is soon over, but it’s time to go back home anyway. Ken is running out of his savings and he has to start working again.